The Veiled Bird

The veiled bird 

In a magical kingdom, a bird sat on a branch, her eyes directed in sad subjection toward  the mirror providing the invisible cage of her soul.

"If only I was not so bleak looking. I'm an aberration of nature in this magical, vibrant kingdom."

The thought supplied another layer of weigh flattening her already crushed spirit.

"My eyes are so dull and without life. My feathers are faded and bedraggled."

As if needing confirmation, she tried to spread her wings, only to have them trapped and restricted by the ashen veil covering her whole being.

"I'll never fly like the other birds. Never leave traces of rainbows.  I'm doomed to sit right here, hidden mercifully by this shroud supplied by those who first recognized my abhorrent existence.

Emitting a soulful shriek, the bird recalled the totality of the agony plastering the bleak and worn road of her miserable life. 

On a nearby branch, unnoticed by the mourner of the incomplete demise, another bird sat, admiring the soulful song and the graceful dance of despair.

"What a beautiful sad song. I feel her pain...it pierces my heart. If only I could provide relief!"

The bird called out, announcing his presence.

No answer was received. So, the unnoticed companion, spellbound by a metallic ray of sun rendering the first bird bathed in a cloak of light and splendid color shining through the veil, stayed put, waiting to be received by an open, bleeding heart.

After a small eternity, the first bird ceased its indulgent, self-castigating dance.

Her eyes fell on the patient visitor.

"What's wrong with you? Why are you here, sitting with one as ugly and miserable as me? I was outcast by my parents, have no friends.  Life itself placed a curse on me. Can't you see I'm shackled to this mirror and this veil?"

Not being able to detect any bonds, the visitor replied cheerfully:

"I heard your song, observed your dance, and it drove me to seek you out. I noticed the resplendent colors of your feathers and their unique, vibrant beauty. Come with me! Leave this veil and this mirror. I can show you the splendor of life- and you will find the beauty I see in you."

"You are deluded! Why are you trying to trick me with your lies? If I believe you and throw off this veil, I will be naked, cold, and vulnerable. If I leave the mirror, I might forget how truly abhorrent I am.  I will get lost in the reflection of what others see."

With that, the bird turned back to its mirror, every now and then flapping her wings, injuring them further in the barbs contained in the veil.

For a long time, the visitor stayed on the branch, braving hunger, cold, and loneliness.

Finally, leaving behind a shimmering tear, it flew off, needing to sustain its own life.

After another while, the first bird turned and noticed she was once again alone.

"Here we go again. Alone." A silver sigh lifted on the gentle breeze like the feather of a fallen angel.

The veil became darker, heavier, and, shivering, the bird wrapped herself tighter into its lulling comfort against the frigid setting of the sun.

Author's note:  To all those amazing birds whose beauty enriches my existence.

BEL

10-23-12

photo from:

 http://www.rukshanahooda.com/galary.php?id=93&pgno=4

These Are the Days

These Are the Days

Author's note: A day early (or several hours, depending on where you are... :)

(in gratitude for the gift of Michael- Happy Birthday!)

The brilliant Sundays we reach up, glittering rays sprinkling our parents’ smile in gold.

The moment we hold full of pride the paper scroll, flashes blinding us, our own pride reflected and magnified in the surrounding sea.

The instant of the first tender touch, the first consuming kiss, the first fumbling awakening.

The affirmation and the promise- sacred bonds weaving a new fold.

The first flutter of the butterfly,  

The agonizing, and quickly forgotten, explosion of purest joy at that first cry.

The first view of the ocean, the last glance of the dying sun.

The fin of the dolphin and the feather of the eagle.

The peace of the wind whispering secrets of old,

The red hot gold erupting from secret depths, creating, destroying.

The last good bye, the sacred tear, the cold hand slipping from human grasp-

The survival of love, engraved in eternity.

These are the days we remember.

Etched as hieroglyphs of laughter, joy, love, pain, tears, and loss into the bark of our hearts,

Forming the rings of our soul.

These are the days we bow our heads in gratitude for we were granted a day, an hour, a moment.

A glimpse of the divine plan.

Thought to be gone by the careless.

Held in infinity by the open heart.

August 28, 2012

ETERNITY

ETERNITY

Author's Note: I wrote this Feb 25, 2012, but tinkered with it until today as it never felt quite right. 3 years missing Michael. And I know not everyone understands, but those who do REALLY do... As we cry and remember, take a moment to listen and see- he is right here in every kernel of creation.

 

Riding along the brilliant ray of sparkling sunlight,

Resonating in the sweeping melodic song of the birds,

Caressing ivory planes of  ivory sand and soft dunes of saffron desserts alike.

Erupting in the brilliant laughter of a child

Or flooding the soft cheeks of the broken lover.

Eternity- a vast span of time to be missed

An infinite range to assemble back into the divine kaleidoscope of music and color.

In the blink of an eye we were dazzled.

In the blink of an eye we thought you lost.

As I close my eyes and see beyond colors,

Shut out the noise and listen beyond waves of sound

Eternity is revealed

As you soar free in immutable glory,

For eternity. 

(BEL 2012)

FRAGMENTS

FRAGMENTS

Help me, she’s killing me…

The bloodshot eye stares down into my soul as greedy claws grasp for my heart.

The punishing slice of the blade rips through tender skin.

Ruby pearls slashing the blanched canvas.

Her toothless, rotten cavern grins down on the sacrifice.

Stunned by the absolute absence of pain I silently plead for mercy:

Make it hurt to make it stop!

Deafening numbness the simple resounding reply.

No escape.

As my heartbeat erratically flutters in my throat like the paralyzed insect in the throes of death’s passionate dance

I scan the space for someone- ANYONE- to step up and intervene.

They are all silent.

Cowards in their corners

Soiling, sniveling, immature larvae,

Praying her wrath will not turn on them.

Why won’t anyone be my salvation?

Where is that white knight riding to the rescue?

Is the sea of scarlet waves too wide?

Or the price to insignificant?

She glares down at me: the superior, patronizing, horrific spotlight falling on one thought-

YOU KNOW THE ANSWER.

The putrid claws hold out the challenge.

DESTROY THE BEAST

Suddenly her features soften.

Mother? An angel? 

Lovingly she tightens the belt around my neck.

Soothing leather cuts into the throat that’s too sore from scorching, unanswered cries.

My universe constricts

The helldriven rhythm of my heart beat finally slows down.

We come eye to eye. 

I see the truth in her empty sockets.

With dying breath I inhale her essence.

Peace is finally within my power.

United at last.

A requiem performed by the angelic chorus of demons inside.

As the scene dims before me in the mirror,

As the lens constricts to that blurred field,

The last, fading light of the mesmerizing sunset falls on the hidden shadow:

Someone new, someone young, someone pure.

With youthful audacity she reaches across the gaping divide.

Stunned, I fall to the ground.

The rush of inhaled oxygen knocking me to my knees.

Staring into the looking glass before me

I find myself

Alone.

Afraid.

Alive.

2/28/12 BJL

Dedicated to A.

Image: Life Through Broken Glass by Firo Technics

 http://firotechnics.deviantart.com/art/Life-Through-Broken-Glass-91417591

LITANY

You, my friend with the wisdom to fill a billion blazing Alexandrian libraries.

May your loquacious words always be without regret and your dark ink never blur from tears.

You, my friend with judgment so sharp and clear as you blindfolded hold the gilded scales of justice,

May the sword never cut your veins and leave you bleeding and forlorn at the stairs to the temple.

You, my friend who must have lived a thousand lives and secretly stowed away all that knowledge into the voyage of this present endeavor,

May you never realize that the flame of youth has not illuminated your inner eye but instead has gauged your vision.

You my friend with the unyielding belief in what is right and wrong as you walk on the  clear-cut path of stones before you,

May you never err from your certainty to wander in the jungle of treacherous doubts.

You, my friend standing above the rest of us hurling blazing fireballs in scathing contempt,

If you are ever brave enough to don the shoes of those you sneer upon, may your steps be secure and may you be protected from that inconspicuously concealed obstacle in the road as your high head soars above us. 

BEL April, 2012

Image: BEL: Early Morning Glow (taken on Indian Head Trail, White Plains, MD) 

The Rainbow

The rainbow

I cried and threw my words in your face

Spilled the wine and broke the glass

Running out the door into the foggy  night, guns blazing,

Cursing the day I ever laid eyes on you.

Sitting trapped in cold and darkness-

Pretending to be strong when all I needed was your call reaching out to me.

The joke was on me.

The vaults are empty without your sustenance.

My throat, swollen and parched from the angry barbs,

Worked hard to swallow the bitterness of false pride.

Tracking all the way back the highway of childish tantrums.

To where I knew I needed to be.

Wanted to be.

Perspective is a funny thing: Now we laugh as we toast how far we have come.

Despite the tears, the angry words, the darkness, and the doubts.

Or because of them.

We look behind- holding hands, watching the obscure dark clouds recede.

No longer the main event, they simply display

The jeweled wonders of the rainbow. 

(BEL 2012) 

Image:  Rainbow Rain by Penguin Lamp

http://creativefan.com/30-majestic-rainbow-photographs-to-inspire-you-with-hope/

THE WARRIOR

The Warrior

Unshaven, in a dirty shirt,

Crumpled like his soul

He dragged himself out of bed

Tired and exhausted.

Disillusioned, his eyed red from unshed tears

From the torture of sleepless nights,

From wounded pride he no longer knew he held.

The fantasy crashed, the scaffold was torched.

Why had he listened to the lies he whispered into the night?

The phantasies painted by well-meaning pansies?

How did he allow hope to haunt the empty halls?

Treacherous laughter echoes from the marble columns of his empty heart

Making a fool of out him.

Yes, the joke was on him.

Finally, it was time to start dying.

The start shot to life had been a misfire.

Yes, he should care about the loss his family would mourn.

And he should care that he would destroy the lives of his loved ones

The very people who reduced the father to a child.

Surely he should feel guilty.

He listened into his conscience:

 The resounding silence a comfort to his dark plan.

The light at the end of the tunnel.

And then the call came.

Can you be here tomorrow at ten?

No- he would be busy.

He had the plan

He had the intent.

This one time he would finally, eternally be successful.

And when the clock struck ten-

Here he was- crumbled shirt, eyes blood shot, soul ripped open.

Granting another human being the ultimate honor:

He reached for the hand offered.

He took a breath.

And he battled on.

(BEL 3-28-12)

Dedicated to the unknown heroes who allow me to battle alongside with them

TRAYVON M

TRAYVON M -

Dedicated to Trayvon Martin and his family- and to all victims of hatred, ignorance, and injustice...

Somewhere in the night a boy saunters to his fathers house,
Armed with the rainbow of Skittles and the cool refreshment of tea.
 

Somewhere in the night a mother engages in routine tasks
Humming a song, reading a book- she doesn't know it's the last night she'll ever be free.
 

Somewhere in the night obsession turns into the urge to act.
A call, an order ignored, he will follow this time:
"These guys always get away" - twisted perception morphs into righteous fact.
 

Somewhere in the night the atonal symphony of running, screams - then a shot.
Somewhere in the night a father checks the unyielding clock.
 

He shakes off the intangible fear, the sudden fright
His child will be alright- he only went to get a snack tonight.

 (BEL- 2012)

 

On February 27, 2012, Trayvon Martin, a 17 year old young teenager, was shot and killed in Sanford, Florida, but the self appointed guard of the local neighborhood watch, George Zimmerman. Trayvon's crime: to walk to his father's house in this gated community after going out for Skittles and iced tea. Zimmerman is not unknown to police- and he obviously was ready to fight "these people"- who in his mind always get away.  He followed Trayvon, thinking the black young man, looked suspicious and was carrying something. He was- his bag of Skittles and his drink.  

Zimmerman (I cannot even bring myself to call him "Mr") followed Trayvon after being told by a 911 operator to not do so. By the way, having organized a neighborhood watch before, this is the first thing police will tell you- NEVER follow or confront someone you deem suspicious.  Call 911 and let it be- you have done your duty.

There was a struggle after Zimmerman confronted Trayvon, who, called for help- then there is a shot.  

A promising young life was cut short. Parents lost a son. A country adds another shameful chapter.  

The police "corrected" witness accounts to what "really" happened.  No charges were filed against Zimmerman.

You ask, how can this happen in America?  Well, sadly, this is not the first time.  Many say, don't bring race into this- but how can that be avoided?  Does anyone really think had a black man shot a white teen in cold blood he would walk free?  Would Zimmerman have assumed a white teenager was "up to no good?"  How long will fear divide us and keep us from having a debate on race and justice that needs to be had- over and over.  

How can this happen- STILL- in America... A very good question... Not the first time- let us pray it will be the last.  

Let's give our citizens hope.  I want to thank our black communities- there has been amazing restraint.  I shiver to imagine how a similar case of a black man killing a white teen without investigation and charges would stir vigilante justice.

 The only bright side of this tragedy: Due to first local, then nationwide outrage and the power of social networking, Trayvon's death is now being investigated by both the FBI and the Justice Department.  

The charge of manslaughter is being discussed by many. Personally, I think that since Zimmerman followed Trayvon despite being TOLD this was not necessary, and then shot him in cold blood (possibly with Trayvon on the ground already), this is not an appropriate charge. But I am ready to let the wheels of justice grind...as long as they are grinding away and are not jammed by antiquated fears, prejudice, and ignorance. 

Every time I look at my son (of mixed race) going out to run in the neighborhood I worry now.  I look at both of my children and I thank God for the gift of their presence in my life.  Trayvon's parents only have memories to sustain them.

Lets add justice to at least make their lives bearable. 

 

Here are some things to read up on if you have not read about this case- and thank you for signing the petition:

 http://www.change.org/petitions/prosecute-the-killer-of-our-son-17-year-old-trayvon-martin

What Everyone Should Know About Trayvon Martin

http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2012/03/18/446768/what-everyone-should-know-about-about-trayvon-martin-1995-2012/

By Judd Legum on Mar 18, 2012 at 6:19 pm

 um on Mar 18, 2012 at 6:19 pm

On February 26, 2012, a 17-year-old African-American named Trayvon Martin was shot and killed in Sanford, Florida. The shooter was George Zimmerman, a 28-year-old white man.* Zimmerman admits killing Martin, but claims he was acting in self-defense. Three weeks after Martin’s death, no arrests have been made and Zimmerman remains free.
Here is what everyone should know about the case:

1. Zimmerman called the police to report Martin’s “suspicious” behavior, which he described as “just walking around looking about.” Zimmerman was in his car when he saw Martin walking on the street. He called the police and said: “There’s a real suspicious guy. This guy looks like he’s up to no good, on drugs or something. It’s raining and he’s just walking around looking about… These a**holes always get away” [Orlando Sentinel]
2. Zimmerman pursued Martin against the explicit instructions of the police dispatcher:
Dispatcher: “Are you following him?”
Zimmerman: “Yeah”
Dispatcher: “OK, we don’t need you to do that.”
[Orlando Sentinel]
3. Prior to the release of the 911 tapes, Zimmerman’s father released a statement claiming “[a]t no time did George follow or confront Mr. Martin.” [Sun Sentinel]
4. Zimmerman was carrying a a 9 millimeter handgun. Martin was carrying a bag of Skittles and a can of iced tea. [ABC News]
5. Martin weighed 140 pounds. Zimmerman weighs 250 pounds. [Orlando Sentinel; WDBO]
6. Martin’s English teacher described him as “as an A and B student who majored in cheerfulness.” [Orlando Sentinel]
7. Martin had no criminal record. [New York Times]
8. Zimmerman “was charged in July 2005 with resisting arrest with violence and battery on an officer. The charges appear to have been dropped.” [Huffington Post]
9. Zimmerman called the police 46 times since Jan. 1, 2011. [Miami Herald]
10. According to neighbors, Zimmerman was “fixated on crime and focused on young, black males.” [Miami Herald]
11. Zimmerman “had been the subject of complaints by neighbors in his gated community for aggressive tactics” [Huffington Post]
12. A police officer “corrected” a key witness. “The officer told the witness, a long-time teacher, it was Zimmerman who cried for help, said the witness. ABC News has spoken to the teacher and she confirmed that the officer corrected her when she said she heard the teenager shout for help.” [ABC News]
13. Three witnesses say they heard a boy cry for help before a shot was fired. “Three witnesses contacted by The Miami Herald say they saw or heard the moments before and after the Miami Gardens teenager’s killing. All three said they heard the last howl for help from a despondent boy.” [Miami Herald]
14. The officer in charge of the crime scene also received criticism in 2010 when he initially failed to arrest a lieutenant’s son who was videotaped attacking a homeless black man. [New York Times]
15. The police did not test Zimmerman for drugs or alcohol. A law enforcement expert told ABC that Zimmerman sounds intoxicated on the 911 tapes. Drug and alcohol testing is “standard procedure in most homicide investigations.” [ABC News]
16. In a cell phone call moments before his death, Martin told a teenage girl that he was “hounded by a strange man on a cellphone who ran after him, cornered him and confronted him.” “‘He said this man was watching him, so he put his hoodie on. He said he lost the man,’ Martin’s friend said. ‘I asked Trayvon to run, and he said he was going to walk fast. I told him to run but he said he was not going to run.’ Eventually he would run, said the girl, thinking that he’d managed to escape. But suddenly the strange man was back, cornering Martin. ‘Trayvon said, ‘What, are you following me for,’ and the man said, ‘What are you doing here.’” [ABC News]
17. Zimmerman told the police “he had stepped out of his truck to check the name of the street he was on when Trayvon attacked him from behind as he walked back to his truck.” “He said he feared for his life and fired the semiautomatic handgun he was licensed to carry because he feared for his life.” [Miami Herald]
18. Zimmerman was not a member of a registered Neighborhood Watch group. Zimmerman also violated basic Neighborhood Watch guidelines by carrying a weapon. [ABC News]

The Martin case had been turned over to the Seminole County State Attorney’s Office. Martin’s family has asked for the FBI to investigate.
* Zimmerman was described by the police as white. According to his family he is also Hispanic.


Think Progress Justice
 http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2012/03/19/447904/breaking-us-department-of-justice-announces-investigation-into-shooting-death-of-trayvon-martin/?fb_comment_id=fbc_10150580016432224_21459464_10150580020247224

 BREAKING: U.S. Department of Justice announces independent investigation into shooting death of Trayvon Martin | Statement: “The department will conduct a thorough and independent review of all of the evidence and take appropriate action at the conclusion of the investigation. The department also is providing assistance to and cooperating with the state officials in their investigation into the incident. With all federal civil rights crimes, the government must prove beyond a reasonable doubt that a person acted intentionally and with the specific intent to do something which the law forbids – the highest level of intent in criminal law. Negligence, recklessness, mistakes and accidents are not prosecutable under the federal criminal civil rights laws.” The U.S. Attorney and the FBI are also participating in the investigation.


A Million Hoodies March for Trayvon Martin
http://www.facebook.com/events/347784265268106/

Trayvon Martin's Last Phone Call Contradicts Shooter's Claim, Attorney 

 http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2012/03/20/148994809/trayvon-martins-last-phone-call-contradicts-shooters-claim-attorney-says

by Mark Memmott

George Zimmerman's statement to police about what 17-year-old Trayvon Martin was up to on Feb. 26 in Sanford, Fla., "is completely contradicted" by the boy's cellphone records, an attorney for Martin's family just said during a news conference in Fort Lauderdale, Fla.
Attorney Benjamin Crump said the African-American teenager had been talking to friends all day and, as first reported earlier today by ABC News, was on the phone with a young girl when he was confronted by, in Crump's words, "neighborhood association loose cannon" Zimmerman.
The girl, Crump said, says Martin was just trying to get back to the house he and his father had been visiting when Zimmerman came into the picture. She heard Martin ask "why are you following me?" Crump said. Another voice, according to the girl, asked at least twice "what are you doing around here?"
Moments later, Martin was shot in the chest.
The 28-year-old Zimmerman, who had called police to report seeing a "suspicious" person and was advised not to follow that person, has told police he acted in self defense.
As we've been reporting, Martin's death has reignited a national conversation about race and racial profiling. And it has led to charges from Martin's family and their supporters that local police failed to adequately investigate. "Arrest killer. He killed this child in cold blood," Crump said a moment ago.
Zimmerman has not been charged with a crime. The federal Justice Department is now getting involved, and the local state attorney announced this morning that he's asked a grand jury to investigate.

Tags: Benjamin Crump, George Zimmerman, Trayvon Martin